Finding My Way...

So much to say, but who wants to hear?

I have had this blog up for about 5 years now. I was still living in Japan when I started it. I had packed up my scrapbooking supplies to prepare to move back to the states, but I didn't want to fall behind. So I posted stories and some photos while they were fresh in my mind so that I could turn them into pages for my scrapbook when we were settled, and my sea freight had arrived.

In the past five years since I started blogging, it has changed so much. People seem to blog for one of three audiences. Some blog for the general public. They try to increase web traffic, they put ads on their blogs, they go to conferences to learn how to blog more effectively. They blog about current events, tips and tricks, or informative topics. They seek to educate and build a community. Some even try to make it a part time job.

Others use their blog to bridge the distance between them and long-distance friends and family. They post photos of the kids, or their latest craft project, or their fabulous vacation to an exotic locale. They aren't interested in attracting the attention of strangers, and may even use a password-protected site.

Still others blog just for themselves. They use their blog to record their feelings, opinions, or perhaps creative writing. They don't care if anyone reads it. If they permit the voyeur, it may be a public blog. They don't watch stats or see where their readers (if any) are coming from. Their blog is the modern version of a Holly Hobby Diary with a cheap silver plate lock on the front that anyone can open with a paper clip or bobby pin.

I do not know where I fall in on this spectrum of bloggers. My audience changes from post to post. Sometimes I share information gleaned from the web or my personal experience, like when I post movie trailers, or write about my struggles with a pre-teen girl. Other days I post photos of a personal event, like the 3-Day Breast Cancer Walk, to share that with my friends and family that support me. I even occasionally write a blog post that is just for me. Just because I feel like typing something, or I feel like I haven't blogged in a while, so I should type up something.

I probably could do a blog post of some sort about every day. What keeps me from doing so is my perpetual struggle with the purpose of this blog. Who is my audience? After my sporadic posting habits for the past year is there even anyone left who reads this thing?!? Why am I writing here and who am I writing for? Do I need to do this writing in a public forum? I enjoy writing; should I choose a topic or two and try to make this into a community? So I want to open myself up to public scrutiny of my writing and opinions?

In any case, that is what I am pondering today. With whom am I pondering?

Getting Creative in 2010

I have wanted to post to the blog for the past two weeks. I have clicked the link to the Typepad dashboard several times, but I have come up empty on ideas for blog posts.

I thought maybe if I surfed some of my favorite blogs, that might give me some inspiration. So I read this weeks secrets on PostSecret. I chuckled at the latest entries on Awful LIbrary Books. I indulged my wordy side with a perusal of Lexicide. All good reading, but nothing was fueling my creative side. So I headed over to a favorite creative blog: Artsyville. 

I *dream* of doodling like Aimee does. I am a big fan of her etsy shop, and this has reminded me to send a link to my Mom, who is grilling me for ideas for a Christmas present. Bewitched by Books is my current favorite, but really, I want 4 or 5 of her 5x7 doodleprints to frame and hang in a grouping near my creative space.

As I was perusing Aimee's latest doodles and photos, on December 4th she encouraged her readers to join her in Leah's 2010 Creative Every Day Challenge. My eyes lit up at this gem. I really feel that since my scrapbooking has slowed, and my writing has all but stopped, I am missing a creative outlet in my life. One is only so creative finding the right clip art for flier and newsletters for the women's club. So there, to the right there. In the right column there is a widget to her site, if you want more info.

I'm hoping to be creative in a variety of ways in 2010. I hope to start scrapping more again. I want to try doodling like Aimee inspires me to do, and perhaps integrate it into my scrapbook albums. I hope to start writing again. This morning I was getting ready and had a great idea for the start of a bit if teen fiction. I have absolutely no idea for a middle or an end, but I have a great idea for a start. I'd like to make some handmade gifts for Emily's teachers.

I will not flood this blog with a daily entry. As we discovered in 2009 with the failed attempt at Project 365 (I petered out by February-March), the perfectionist in me abandons daily reporting entirely once I miss a few times and it's no longer complete. I aim to report on the week's creativity once a week. Who's in?

In 2008 I resolve...

* to get back onto Weight Watchers and eat better.

* to get back into a routine of exercising at Curves 3x/week.

* to take a photography class to learn to use my DSLR to a fuller potential.

* to remember 12 of 12 each month for a year to create a scrapbook album.

* to work scrapbooking back into my weekly schedule now that I am in more of a rhythm with the new job.

* to host another small group Bible study at our home one evening a week.

* to read at least 2 books (without pictures) each month.

Last year I didn't feel moved to make any resolutions, but I was also at a real low last winter.  I am doing much better this year on my medicine regimen, and I really want to make some life choices with purpose.

What do you resolve for 2008?

Summer Has Begun!

I have wanted to add something to the blog all week.  Em got out of school on Monday, and I thought we'd have a nice idle week filled with trips to the pool and relaxing lunches and scrapbooking while she watched a little TV to wind down in the afternoons.  HA!  We had family visiting from out of town early in the week, and my Mom has been having car trouble, so she and I went to test drive a new car for her later in the week.  Yesterday I took her to the airport for a weekend with her cousins in Massachusetts for a Greek Festival.

I do have some new writings to add to the blog, but I am having trouble cutting and pasting and keeping the right format.  I am not keen to type them over again, so I will keep trying to sort this out.

In the meantime...hubby and daughter are at the zoo with my brother-in-law and his boys today, and I am scrapping!  I have NO points in Summer Scrapfest at LifetimeMoments.com and that is about to change!  This morning I added journaling to a LO I worked on lastnight, and got myself my first 4 points.

So, look for some updates this week.  Hassle me if I neglect you.  And enjoy the first weekend of summer!

So ANYTHING is better than nothing, right?

I haven't posted much on this blog through the past six months.  Partially because it's been a dark time, and partially because I don't feel like I have anything interesting to write about.  I don't generally write about the mundane, because I figure who cares about my mundane?  I started this as a place to stretch my writing.  I need to get back to that.  So for those of you who check in on this blog from time to time, you may start seeing some writing exercises.

My husband found me this great book full of writing prompts.  It's called The Write Brain.  It's 365 days of ideas to get some writing flowing.  I plan to share most of my efforts here.  Don't get confused, as much of it will be fiction.  It's an exercise, and editing does not take place, so pardon errors.  It's being shared "as is" if you will.

The first exercise I tried had three sets of three words.  In each set I was supposed to select one of the words.  Then I was to write a passage that included those three words.  The words I selected were carousel, insensitive and keepsake.  I also needed to start the passage with the phrase "Some days I feel like a gerbil, running around and around on his wheel!"

Some days I feel like a gerbil, running around and around on his wheel! That’s what I thought to myself as I headed out the door of Starbucks, Peppermint Latte in hand, and headed to work. Another day, more clients, more meetings, more phone calls. My head was swimming from the mile long to-do list I had for today.

As I imagined that gerbil going around and around, I thought about one of the nicer jobs I’d had in my youth. One summer while I was in college I worked at the Flying Horses Carousel on Martha’s Vineyard. It was the oldest carousel of its kind still in use. The horses were hand-carved wood, and it had a ring arm with steel rings for the riders to catch as they passed. That was a job with no pressure. Just make sure everyone was belted in and holding on, then pull the handle to start the ride. A few historical facts to share with everyone from the prepared spiel, and go for a ride...

That was the summer I met Anthony. He was just gorgeous. I had no reason to believe he would have any interest in chubby little me, but he did. He was the best kisser on the planet. And we kissed everywhere; in the basement of the carousel building, on the beach, in the back row of the movie theater, in the hammock in his parents yard, everywhere. He taught me to kiss. He used to give me pointers. At first I thought it was a little insensitive of him to make me feel like my kissing wasn’t up to par, but kissing him was so nice I forgot about being offended.

We knew it was a summer romance. There was no illusion that it would be any more than that. One warm July night we were walking around Oak Bluffs and noticed a time capsule was buried in front of the police station. The stone marking it said it would be opened again about seven years from that night. We talked about coming back to that spot when then opened up the time capsule, to see each other again. That never happened though. I don’t remember when that was supposed to happen, but it was years ago now, and I’ve never been back. I wish I had something from Anthony, a little keepsake to remind me of the summer I learned to kiss.

A car horn shook me from this lovely memory and I saw that the light was green in front of me. I begrudgingly made the final turn into the parking lot at work, and gulped the last of my latte. Slinging my bulging briefcase over my shoulder, I sighed as I headed inside to face my busy day.